#but i think my expectations for it were too high so it doesnt really matter
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@xrinnihil the creators of parkour civilization finally posted the fanart reaction video they said they'd upload like. 2 weeks ago. ive been waiting so eagerly and so long for this silly little video dude
what do i do with my life now that the video is out....
#it was a good video but a little shorter than what i hoped for#but i think my expectations for it were too high so it doesnt really matter#still a good video!#you should watch parkour civilization on youtube if you havent yet#then enjoy the fanart reaction afterwards if you want to#there are 2 parkciv movies so a total of 4 hours which is. a bit much if you dont have free time but if you do i highly recommend it!#its so entertaining
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hiiiiii reinna i love ur work it makes my day everytime i read it lmaooo <333
i was wondering if u could make a fic abt sunoo like youre the 8th member of enhypen and since youre not that girly or act cute like the other female idols instead kinda tomboy and baddie sunoo finds you annoying cos hes not used to it but the other members r fine. one day after dance practice (y/n and jungwon r roomates) saurrr jungwon told yn the tea abt sunoo hating her but yn secretly likes sunoo. So after jungwon left to go somehwere idk shopping?? Yn cried n cried n cried and u can basically use ur creative imagination for the rest 👻👻 pls make it smut at the end tho i love it 👻👻👻
Thanksssssss miss bestest ever writter everrrr!! 1!111!1 ❤️❤️❤️
"Ddeonu....."
@reyna-ohno - I hope i did you justice ;)
Warnings: unprotected smut, fingering, gossiping, enemies to lovers trope, some minor angst, cursing's, a little bit of hate sex....and i think that's it. to make it more believable, Y/n has her own room but is close with the members and allows them to come hang out. I wrote majority of this while i was on bedrest recovering, so i apologize this is not proofread.
"She's really not at all like the others..." Jake remarks as he sits next to Heeseung, noting that your behavior on camera, was very much genuine as you were no different than how you were off camera.
"Yeah she doesnt seem to be into that whole cutsie thing. Kind of refreshing actually."
"Yeah man, i think so too."
Everyone could relatively agree, to see you be yourself, it was new and fresh, and a delight to see. For Sunoo, it was an abomination.
While you were filming alongside Jungwon, while you were chic and stylish in your own manner, you opted for casual and simple flares of fashion rather than the traditional girly and fancy type. With a loose pair of jeans on, a fitted tee shirt with a matching baseball cap, you displayed your smile and laughter by having a good time being the only girl member in the band.
Watching from aside, Sunoo glares and rolls his eyes. Next to him, Sunghoon pops over and gives him a slight side bump to break the silence after noting the look of irritation on his face. "Whats got you all worked up?"
"Why can't she just be like the rest of the girls in the industry? She's not at all doing well on these weverse lives, people want to see cute girls being....cute...not relaxed and chilled."
"give her a break, she's just being herself man. Can't be mad at that."
"I'm not mad i just.....i just dont get it." Sunoo shakes his head as he turns and walks away with his arms crossed, obviously irritated by your lack of enthusiasm when it came to attempting to be adorable, much like your counterpart, Jungwon. For a young man to be far more agile in being cute in his mannerisms, more than you, that usually was an indicator that you were someone who was far too much of a hopeless cause. Truth of the matter, Sunoo knew what the public liked, he knew that fans liked it when idols did silly and cute things like finger hearts, squinting eyes while displaying a cat like smile, or making high pitched sounds. You didn't do any of that, nor did you attempt it, which caused him to wonder if you were going to be the downfall of Enhypen.
Finishing the live stream, you and the boys all made your way back home to the dorm where you nestled yourself in you room, conveniently next to Jungwon's, who had developed a close bond with, much like a sibling. Since receiving your room assignments, being the only girl, you got your own room, yet it was nice to have Jungwon right next to you, since it was easy for him to come in and out to visit all throughout the night to hang out or watch tv together. Tonight was no different, especially with the new episodes of your guys favorite tv show coming out.
*Knock knock*
"come in." you softly call out, and as expected, you watched as Jungwon brings in a plate of fresh hot hotteok, and tea.
"did you start it?"
"no not yet, was waiting for you."
"Ah."
settling in as he places the plate and two cups on the table, you both prepared to watch the latest episode. As the opening credits rolled, Jungwon took the opportunity to talk about the vlive from earlier.
"Hey so......only because i'm the leader.......but......does it bother you that Sunoo.....well....you know...."
Raising your eyebrows in confusion as you munched on the honey filled treat, you looked up and shrugged your shoulders slightly. "What do you mean?"
"You dont know?"
"Know what?"
Jungwon sighs as he curses himself for opening a door that he wish he hadn't. "nevermind."
"Nooooo...dont be like that....tell me."
"its just....well....he really doesnt like you......and he makes it obvious."
Stunned, your eyes grew wide as you felt your heart drop. "Oh....he does?"
"yeah......do you want me to talk to him about it?"
Shaking your head, you kept your composure as best as you could. "No...its fine.....i'm sure he'll get over it."
Jungwon smiles in return. "yeah, i'm glad you're not too upset about it."
But the fact of the matter was, you were upset....deeply. No one would know of it, since you were very much strategic in keeping it hidden, but you were quite fond of Sunoo....you actually liked him even....so much, that you caught yourself dreaming of him, fantasizing on what it would be like to snuggle up with him, going on dates, or just being in his embrace and smelling his cologne.
You held it all in and the entire night, one episode after another, you felt as if your heart was punching your chest outward.
...........
"Well, i'm gonna go to bed. we got an early morning tomorrow, so dont stay up too late."
"Okay." you feigned a smile as you watched him walk out. The moment you left the room, you hid yourself into the dimmed lighting in your room and began crying. You felt hurt. Did Sunoo really not like you? Why? You both hardly shared any words to one another. Yet it all started to make sense, for all the times you though back when you tried to make conversation, only to watch him side eye you as he would get up and leave the room. There were other moments too, such as whenever you would sit right next to him, and he'd let out an exhausting sigh, and get up to walk across the other side of the room to sit in a different seat. Initially, you didn't think much of it, you had thought he merely was just shy or just was not used to being around female idols. But now......it all makes senses. The man who you really wanted to be with....the one you admired from afar, day dreamed...the one you would do anything for, actually disliked you.....hated you......
Sobbing away into your kneecaps as you held your legs to your chest, you failed to notice that Jungwon had mistakenly left your door cracked open, not shutting it all the way through. With the bit of the dimmed lighting peeking out from the crack, the hallway remained pitch black with just a strip of the orange and yellow hue coming from your room.
Walking up after grabbing a bottle water from the kitchen, Sunoo strolls through the same hallway, all to reach his room at the end of the corridor.
hearing the faint sounds of your sobs, he takes a swig of his water and gulps it down as he sides eye the slivers crack in the door.
“is she….crying? What is her deal?”
sighing out in frustration, he took the chance to enter and see if he could get you to stop, considering your room was across from his. With all that sniffling and whimpering, it would be hard for him to get some sleep with your cries echoing in the hall. Walking into the dimmed room, he gently shuts the door behind him and walks further in. Breaching the opening of your room, he stands straight and leans against the wall while watching your pitiful state. Taking another gulp of water down, he rolls his eyes as he breaks the silence.
“you know if you’re going to cry, you can at least have your door shut all the way through so you don’t wake anyone.”
jolting out of your fetal position, you look up him with your tear stained face. Shocked, your eyes were wide and glossy, pieces of your hair remained plastered on your face and you softly whimpered out a few sniffles before stuttering out an “s-sorry….”
eyeing you down, he takes yet, another gulp from his bottle. Switching his gaze to the floor as he screws the cap back on, he crosses his arms before asking you the big question, merely because he grew curious after seeing your face.
“so…..”
confused, you sat there in silence and looked off to the side before turning back to him. “……um….s..sorry?”
sighing out as he rubbed his temple, he finally speaks out. It was soft yet firm, with a low tone….much lower than what he normally dispelled.
“bitch why are you crying?”
taken aback, your eyes became overflowing with the stinging of tears once more when you heard his harsh tone. Whimpering into your kneecaps again, he rolled his eyes in defeat as he regains composure and attempts this once more.
“okay okay look….just tell me why you’re crying. Can you do that? Hmm? Can you just stop and talk for a second? I’d like to eventually get some beauty rest.”
you shifted over and turned your back towards him.
“just go sunoo…….you’re not going to be the solution to any of my problems right now.”
“Huh…..”
gaining width in his widened glare, you heard his foot steps and thought he was walking in the opposite direction to exit the room. It wasn’t until you felt his weight plopping beside you that you realized he was sitting right next to you. Not only that, but the moment you heard his careless whisper, how his hot breath touched your ear, you knew he was far closer than he had ever been with you.
“Why is that?” He whispered into your ear. you shuttered as you felt an electric shock travel up and down your spine.
“stop! Why are you here? Why do you even care or try? I know you hate me…..just….leave me alone.” You broke down and began to sob as you lashed out the truth.
he didn’t deny it, nor did he try to argue with you on your statement, he did in fact, borderline hated you. Though hearing you say it aloud made him feel a certain type of way about it.
“you’re right….I do hate you.”
“could you please just go……..I….I don’t understand…I’ve never done anything to you….I’ve tried to be nice and I’ve always been helpful…..I’ve……I’ve don’t everything I could to make you see how much I care…” breaking down, you sobbed as you curled your body in.
“I know.” He admitted, nonchalantly at that, as if he knew all this time yet still found it suitable to hate you. But that’s as all about to change….
feeling his hand grasp your shoulder and turning you over, in a rather forceful nature, you gasped out in shock as you witness his frame hovering over you. His feline eyes staring right into your iris and a soft, very faint smile appeared on his pouty lips.
his pupils shift in random direction as he takes in y the sight of your face. Releasing a soft chuckle, he calmly speaks out.
“cute.”
caught off guard, he blinked in shock before uttering an “excuse me?” Bidding him to clarify.
“I said, ‘cute’. Does crying make you deaf too?”
“why are you being this way? I don’t get it…..”
“welcome to my world."
"What is your problem!?" you snapped. you've about had it with his cocky attitude and the lack of sincerity in his tone. Yet the moment he pinned you down as he leaned further in, with his nose pressed against your cheek and his hot breath grazing against your lips, you were shocked still.
"you know, you put on that act to behave like one of the guys. you act cool and casual, and you treat all aspects of being a girl as something that is beneath you. yet look at you now.....crying and looking so adorable......so soft....all your feminine features coming out with each tear drop you cry out."
"ar.....are you toying with me?"
"Maybe.......is that bad?.....is that something that bothers you?"
Shrugging from left to right, you try to break free from his grasp as he began to hold on to your wrists. "huh....you're even cuter when you struggle."
"stop it! get off of me!"
"I will.....if you can get me off." he smirks with that sly smile that he was known for. You gave in as you break down from feeling the immense different in strength. Despite being the carefree and adored idol he was, Sunoo was indeed still, a man.
"Why .....just why....?"
Smirking once more, he leans further in and pauses just before his lips are met with yours. "ddeonu" he whispers.
You raised a brow in annoyance as you whispered back. "is that supposed to be funny? like a joke?"
Once more, he whispers back "ddeonu....you tell me...." smiling and smirking against your lips, you faintly smile back as you feel his grasp loosen and soften up, with his finger tips stroking your skin.
"do. you really hate me?" you asked.
Before he could answer, you softy whispered and cut him off. "let me guess.....ddeonu?"
His eyes widening for a moment, he whispers firmly and tells you, "say it again."
Leaning slightly upward, you softly tell him......"ddeonu....."
His lips lock yours in. His hands eagerly roam up and down your body. Your hands rest on his broad shoulders as you feel his grope slightly shift your body upward from the overwhelming sensation of his soft skin traveling all over your stomach, your breasts, and your ribcage. breaking the kiss to catch his breath, ultimately allowing for you to do the same, he breathes out his gasping words as he rips your buttons apart.
"Whine for me....little girl."
"No Sunoo...."
"Do it."
Kissing you, he shoves his hand down your shorts and flickers his two fingers against your clit. Just as he wanted, you whimper into his mouth as he holds your wrists down with one hand. "Whine some more." he breathes out.
Meshing his lips with yours, he rubs your slit up and down and presses his palm on it as he clams a grip and shoves his tongue deeper into your mouth.
Breaking free for a moment, you turn your head and gasp out. "God!.....I hate you i swear."
"Do you now? Tell me how much you hate the fox." he mumbles against your lips, as. he pulls down your shorts and panties, rolling them down past your kneecaps.
"Sunoo....." you whispered out.
Hovering over, he props his frame on his knees and pulls his shirt off, loosening his sweatpants, he leans back in and props his chest to remain heightened just above your exposed breasts as he uses his arm to stilt himself up. His hair loosely draping down as he eyes you with an intrigued glare.
"you look so cute when you cry...."
"........you're crazy."
"every sly fox is." he smirks as he kisses you once more, this time it was tender, and more gentle. Leaning all the way down, you relished as his body melts into yours, your arms wrap around his neck as you feel him probe your entrance. Gasping for air, you grip on to his shoulders and dig your fingers in as you feel him slide the remaining length inside you.
"Y-you...you're not wearing a condom." you breathed out, wincing your eyes shut as you felt the sting of him inserting all the way through.
"Don't worry.....i know you're a good girl....and you know i'm clean.....considering we're with each other all the time." he heavily breaths out upon feeling the pressure of your entry squeezing him as he bottoms out inside.
It was true, since you always had feelings for the man to your right, you never once paid any mind to all of your fans, the other idols, or staff that showed interest. You remained faithful to a dream that you never thought would have come, yet you stayed hopeful. The dreams alone, were enough to get you by, now that you were in this moment, it all felt surreal.
"Ah! You...you're too big!"
Kissing you tenderly, he begins to thrust slowly and deeply. "Yeah?....It might be because you're super tight." wincing at the last part, he grits his teeth slightly as he pulls out yet kept the tip nestled in before shoving himself all the way back in through.
"Fuck.....you're really tight......" breathing in deeply into your ear, he caresses both sides of your head and twirls his fingers with your hair as he softly kisses your helix, nibbles on your lobe and licks the inside of your ear canal.
"Ugh! ugh! Sunoo!" you gasp out as you release each pleasurably moan and bite your lip. Remaining in the missionary position, Sunoo props himself up as he lifts both your legs and rests them over his shoulders. "S...sstop." you shyly utter out as he positions you to be fully exposed and in his view. "Shhhh......be a good girl." breathes out as he reaches around one of your thighs and circles the pad of his thumb on your clit. With your hips dipping high and low with each thrust, he picks up the pace upon seeing how delectable your breasts looked as they jiggle up and down from his momentum.
"Oh.....shit....move like that some more baby girl...." he gasps as the sweat beads drip down and his hair glistens and becomes slick wet. "Move...baby....move some more...." thrusting in faster and faster, you lose breath as his bumping thrust instilled a raging sense of pelting pleasure that penetrates deep into your chest.
"Oh.......oh my god...fuck.......what.....what are you doing??...." you gasp out as you bite on to your finger as you shift your face off to the side, your body drenched with sweat as you take in thrust after thrust. Feeling him easily sliding in, you felt your body leaking the bit of moisture onto his lengthy shaft as his thrusts and friction caused it to thicken and cream up on the base of your opening, with a reside ringing around his length.
"Shhhh......take it cutie....fuck.......take it all." he gasps out as he thrusts in deeper, leaning back in as his chest rests atop your breasts, locking your lips in once more. Your moans started to pick up volume, so he swoops a hand and gently covers your mouth while planting his lips on your forehead, taking in the feeling of your face jolting up and down as he pelts you with his hip thrusts. "Oh you're so fucking good.....you know that?" he whispers as he kisses your sweaty brow line as you moan out your muffled answer into his palm. "keep taking it.....just......shit....little more......r-...right there...." gasping out a deep breath, he pulls out his shaft and watches as the slime of your body's lubricant and his pre-cum lines a bridge between your entry and his tip. Aiming for your breasts, he holds his shaft steadily in his palm as he releases and paints your chest with his seed. Chuckling as he catches his breath, he kisses your face tenderly as you whimper out, trying your best to calm your heartbeat.
"Can't get you pregnant....not yet.....staff and company wouldn't like that....." with a tender kiss, he softly rolls his tongue around, massaging the inside of your cheeks as he continues.
"but maybe.....a little later......maybe we'll make something as cute as you.....hmm?"
Tired, breathless, weakened and limp, you whispered out "ddeonu...." to which he laughs as he keeps his lips planted on your cheek.
"I do...."
Enjoyed this piece? Show love and treat your girl to a cup of coffee.��♥️ ☕ Ko-fi: ko-fi.com/reinbow
#enhypen sunoo#sunoo x reader#kim sunoo#sunoo smut#enha sunoo#enhypen scenarios#enhypen au#enha drabbles#enhypen#enha fics
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Truth or dare
quaritch x recom reader
summary: you were put into the recom team as a therapist and a medic, you were also a marine, you get invited to play a game of truth or dare randomly with the rest of the recoms, not thinking anything of it and not knowing where it was gonna lead you
warnings: teasing, knife play, rough quaritch, sub reader, punishments, dares, embarassment, just pure filth so beware minors ❗️NOT PROOF READ❗️
LOTS AND LOTS OF TYPOS THAT IM TOO LAZY TO FIX
note: this is super shitty and rushed because my accounts dead and the story doesnt make sense
you were recently added to the recom team in an avatar body, you were their therapist and medic, but you also joined wars because you used to be a marine.
you heard ur name being called over the loud speakers, it was ardmors calling you somewhere, probably another therapy session for one of the recoms because theyre losing their sanity, the only one that seemed somewhat stable was quaritch
infact it was a therapy lesson, you expected it to be lyle or mansk because they were the most unstable ones out of the group and they came to your office randomly to talk about things that are bothering them , you made your way to your office, opening the door expecting lyle or mansk, but to your surprise, it was quaritch?
hes never been in your office once, you stood still for a few seconds after opening the door, you came back to your senses and closed the door, the rusty hinges making a squeaking sound
"hey" you said, pulling your chair to sit down, you open the book where you put upcoming sessions, and infact quaritch was there, how didnt you notice before?
"okay so, tell me whats been bothering you" you say, in a stable tone
"nothin's botherin me i was forced to come here" he says, leaning lightly on the chair, arms crossed against his chest and his legs open
"theres no way nothings been bothering you, you just came back from that war with sully and you experienced some things.." you say
eventually after convincing him, he eventually spilled the things that were bothering him, you also got to know more about him during that session, ylu and quaritch were already friends, not quite but you waved to eachother and greeted eachother
you also played gamenighgs together every thursday, so you could say you were friends. but you got to know him more today
after that jaw dropping session, you went to your room, changed and sat in bed, it was thursday, aka gamenight day
after a long nap, you got up getting dressed in shorts, keeping your shirt on, not that it mattered what you wore becausr everyone would just meet up in whatever they eere wearing head to the mess hall, you were a few minutes late
you walked through the halls, opening your tab to check if you had any messages from anyone
you reached the mess hall, they were already playing something, seated on the floor with a bottle in the middle, the moment you saw the bottle you hesitated going back because you knew its either a kissing game or some dirty ass game of truth or dare, most likely lyles idea
you made up your mind, continuing your walk to the empty area in the messhall, "hey, move a bit? i wanna join" you say, they stared up at you
they moved and you sat across from lyle, you noticed quaritch was sitting on a table on the other side of the mess hall, across from ja, looked like they were playing poker. the bottle spun, you noticed Z-dog barsly had any clothes on and lyle had shoes taped to his head, mansk wasnt wearing a shitt which was very unusual and prager and the rest had red handprints on their faces
"soooo what we playing?" you say "truth or dare, whos gonma spin it?" lyle answers
z dog grabs the bottle and spins it, it landed on prager and mansk, prager asked and mansk answered
"truth or dare masnkkk" he said, in a high pitched voice to mock mansk "truth, gotta save myself from whatever demonic shit you were planning"
prager asked his question, it was a really dumb one
you spun the bottle this time, it landed on you and lyle, lyle asked and you answered
"truth or dare Y/N" "dare" you said, awaiting the most likely humiliating dare you were gonna get
"sit next to quaritch n touch him somewhere your not supposed to, if u dont do it youve gotta pay up, 50 dollars!"
"ugh fuck you lyle! i wont be pahing 50 dollars to youe broke ass" you put your hand on the floor, pusshing yourself upwards to stand up, yoy stared in quaritchs direction
you walked over to the table where he was sitting with ja, both focused on the game they were playing, you sat nect to quaritch, way too close for your liking, your thighs were just a few inches away from touching
you leaned your hand on the table leaning your head on it
you noticed your friends staring at you with wide smiles on their faces looking like theyre about to burst out laughing
you position your other hand to sit against quaritchs thigh
you lift your hand, setting it on quaritchs thigh
quaritch turmed around to face you, he didnt even notice you sit nect to him because of how focusrd he was and he went back to playing the game, you got uo and left heading back to your friends
you played for almost 15 minutes after that, alot of humiliating dares coming through
finally, everyone left, the only people left were you, lyle, quaritch, ja, and z dog in the room, you stopped plahing truth or dare because you were only 3 players
you said bye, and started walking the way to your room, you jeard footsteps behind yoy as you approached the door, and then you felt a harsh tug at your hair, you felt yourself being pushed back against a tall broad figure
"what do ya' think ya' were doin huh?"
he said, you recognised quaritchs voice "sorry sir..? i dont quite get what you mean" you said, inoccently asif what you did never happened
"i heard you n the others playing a game of truth n dare huh? you know?" he said, letting go of your hair inorder for you to face him
"o-oh that? it was just a silly dare, i promise it wont happen again sir" you said staring at the ground, you should have just payed those 50 dollars
"theres no it wont happen again now kid, unlock your door ive seen the way you look at me" he was correct, you have stared at him a few times admiring him but it was never something serious ,right?
while you were unlocking the door, quaritch said something "ya know that therapy session we had? none of those things were botherin me as much as ya were, knowing that we couldnt have eachother because of this syupid mission, hell its the entire purpose of our life now! we were revived to fight"
you didnt reply, opening your door and lettinf quaritch in, not expecting what he was going to do
as soon as you locked the door, you felt yourself being lifted up only to be harshly throws across your bed, quaritch grabbing you by your hair again, lifting you up and laying your lower half across his lap
"ya may not like this but ion reslly give a shit"
before you could even respond, your shorts were pulled down and, a hard smack was delivered to your ass
you let out a whimper, not expecting him to full on smack your ass??
"thas what you get for listening to those bastards you filthy little slut huh?"
"yes.." you say
"yes what?" he says before delivering another harsh smack on your ass
"yes.. s-sir..?"
"good girl" he says, pulling you up by ypur shoulders, laying you down on the bed gently, which surprised you because ylu thought he was gonna throw you again
you didnt notice him pull out a knofe from his pocket, in an instant, his pocket knife was on your neck, leaving little cuts
you couldnt do anything, your hands were restrained above your head
you could also see quaritch clearly getting hard by the obvious bludge in his pants, it looked like he was enjoying the torture he was putting you through
he pressed his knife ahainst your soft flesh again going a bit deeper, you hiss and you try to get away from his grip only to find his hand meeting your face at what looked like the speed of light, leaving a red mark on your face
"stay silent, or else there wont be a reward" there was a reward? you didnt expect there to be a reward especially by how cruel colonel is
after a few more cuts across your entire body, he stopped setting his knife on your nightstand
"i think ya did well enough" he says
the heat in between your legs burning, spilling with your slick, you were only wearing panties, still in your tshirt
he pressed his hand against your clothed cunt, your panties basically dripping wet at this point
"looks like ya enjoyed it?" you nod
he fingered your clothed cunt, emitting a few moans from you, not silencing you this time
"p-please" you say, you were fed up with his teasing, it was too much
"please what? whatcha want me to do" he says, with a shit eating grin on his face, a grin you wouldnt see even if he killed sully
"please.. touch me?" you say unsure of what you want him to do you just wanted to feel your orgasm
"where" he says, and youve had enough, you grab your panties yo pull them down, tired of his teasing 'for fucks sake' you mumble
"eager i see? here let me-" he says, the moment your panties where on the floor, he grabbed both your thighs splitting them apart
bringing his fingers toward your cunt, circiling the sensetive bud, which was enough to rip a few moans from you
he unexpectedly slipped both of his fingers inside of you at once, making you let out the loudest moan yet, he continues circiling your clit while thrusting both his fingers inside of you
"i-im. g-gonna-" then it stopped, he pulled his fingers out of you "not yet sweetheart, only place youll be cumming is on my cock" he says i. a deep raspy voice
you were flipped onto your stomache ass in the air, you heard metal clinking which you could guess was quaritchs belt coming undone
and soon enough, you felt his cock brush up against your ass, he grabbed it by his hand leading it down to your slick folds, moving it up and down "mmh"
his tip pressed up against your enterance, slowly pushing his length inside of you, you were in a navi body but he was still too big
half his lemgth was pushrd inside of you, stretching your "virgin" walls wider than theyre even been stretched
you werent a virgin in the past, its just that youve never done something like this in this body
quaritch looked down, his braid falling onto his chest, his eyes widened an idea popping in his head
"ya wanna do that thing? the navi thing?" you nodded, too cockdrunk already to even respond, let alone think straight
you frlt your braid being pulled, pink tendrils looking for something to lash onto
you felt the nerves tpuch against something right before you felt a rush of adrenaline in your body, your vision turning white, feeling everything quaritch was feeling
you let out a soft whimper "move" you said, eager for release
he startrd moving softly, each time he bottomed out he touched your cervix, shooting a rush of pleasure accross your body eachtime he touched it, it felt even better because you could feel everything he was feeling
soon enough, he was rutting into you like there was no tommorow, groans emitting from his throat while soft whimpers and moans came out of your mouth
"im gonna cu-" "go ahea-d" a slight crack in his voice, you camr your orgasm shooting across your body, you sae stars for a few seconds, quaritch helping you ride out your high
you felt a warm and sticky substance shoot into your cunt, quaritch loosing rythm of his thrusts, he thrusted into you a few more times, before finally bottoming out
sweat trickling across his and your body, the tsaheylu camr undone, a few seconds after that, quaritch pulled out of you, a thick rope of cunt connecting his cock to your cunt
you collapsed onto your bed, too cockdrunk to process things, by the time quaritch cleaned you up, you were already fast asleep, only to soon be joined by quaritch cuddling eachother to sleep, he never seemed like a cuddly type of guy but i guess i was wrong
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comment to be added to my taglist and please repost and like :))
#avatar#avatar miles quaritch#mansk x reader#avatar mansk#colonel miles quaritch#recom mansk#atwow#avatar the way of water#recom x reader#atwow smut#quaritch x reader#quaritch imagine#colonel quaritch#colonel miles quaritch x reader#avatar atwow#avatar colonel
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I dunno if ya do asks or not. But, looking at your KronFau parents au with Ceci is just making me think of baby Ame just randomly coming home with an automaton
KF: whatcha got there?
Ame, half dragging a semi unwinded Ceci: mud!!
HI im late because i never really check tumblr, and i dont know how to do asks in general so i hope this works, but im taking a small break from drawing rn, HOWEVER i will give you this brainrot that turned out to be longer than i expected but i need to yap
an kronfau parents, baby ame au where maybe ame is very ""isolated"" from her peers (probably due to being constantly dirty and having a fascination with small living creatures and being a completely yapper over them(takes after fauna)), so shes used to playing by herself
you didnt specify what type of age cece would have, so im choosing to imagine she appears to be a few years older than ame (spoiler: kronii learns mechanics and always fixes cece up so she also ages with ame, but thats later on)
but maybe kfa moves to a secluded area because they are not made for the city (no matter how much kronii wishes they were), but fauna's happy because at least theres a cottage, and ame's happy because they live near a creek which means DIRT! AND BUGS! AND SNAKES- (and kronfau has a heart attack the first time ame brings one in)
but theyve gotten a little used to ame bringing in lots of creatures (which she eventually has to say bye bye to on the porch because kf is NOT hosting bugs in this home)
however, one day ame is following maybe a tiny spider and ventures off a little more than she's used to, narrating her whole journey, maybe like-
Mama said not to go too far without permission! BUT- she didn't specify who's! [in a high voice] "Ame, can i have YOUR permission to go off beyond the river? (a one foot wide stream of water)" [in a deep voice] "Why, yes Ame! But only if you bring back something fun in return!" [normal voice] "Well, if you say so!" and she skips along and splashes through the puddles
of course, the creek looks the same (but ame NEVER gets lost! right...?), and maybe ame shouldn't have lost track of the (tiny) river, but uh, its fine! eventually mama fauna will call out to her and she'll use her voice to come back home-
and then she trips on a rock.
but then its a very weird rock. like.. weeeiiiiirrd. like. a leg- OH MY GOD
oh no need to worry, its still attached to its person- OH MY GOD
ame probably hides behind a tree or something but after nothing happens, she decides to grab a stick and poke the person. still, nothing happens, so ame decides, yup! thats safe! and inspects it, and what do yknow? this person has "one of em windy- thingies" on their head, and ame knows what to do with that!
so she ends up carefully grabbing it, and then twisting it! or trying. but it doesnt budge. so ame thinks-
"Mum's super strong. What does she do before lifting heavy things...?" And she widens her stance- "ALL IN THE LEGS BABY-"
and the key finally budges and ame falls onto the person's lap. and when she looks up, the thing looks back at her and- OH MY GOD!!!
a friend!!
and ame introduces herself and the robot asks her if she could wind her more, but ame says its too heavy (she tries again, to no avail), but she knows someone SUPER strong!! (mum kronii, of course), and they can ask her for help!
"Where is she then?" "...Good question!"
but ame knows because ame NEVER gets lost and ... ames lost. but its okay! because right on time, fauna starts calling out for ame. however, it sounds like the voice is coming all around them, and.. it appears ame's plan is falling apart. but ame doesn't panic! she NEVER panics! especially when its gonna get dark soon, and ame's afraid of the dark, and shes all alone in this big forest creek whatever-
but she's not alone.
and when this strange person robot windy toy asks if ame is trying to find the voice, ame says yes, because her moms taught her to not lie (and she doesnt feel like lying right now).
so, moss peels away, cobwebs fall apart, and leaves rustle towards the ground - and ame's friend stands up.
next thing you know, kronii's getting ready to go out into the creek because fauna's getting worried that ame hasn't showed up, until ame calls out-
"MAMA! LOOK WHAT I FOUND!" "Oh, thank goodness, my heart- ... Amelia. What is that." and uh oh! fauna told ame to try and not get dirty today! (she says that everyday, but whos keeping track) but still, ame can't really lie in this scenario, so- "Mud!!"
and kronii and fauna just stare at this robot girl because. what. the fuck.
"Kronii! No cursing!" "I THINK THIS ONCE I SHOULD BE ALLOWED TO."
and wouldn't you know it. kronfau adopts another daughter.
something like that :) hope this is fine! also sorry for being late, i really dont check tumblr but i should more often! this is fun haha
#hololive#hololiveen#ceres fauna#ouro kronii#kronfau#amelia watson#kronfau parents#kronfauamely#kfac#cecilia immergreen#drabbles
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At first I was mixed about Lily's return but the more I think about the more it feels right.
Lily is cursed.
She is the woman in the comics that kills Lorie and her baby at the prison before snapping and killing the Governor.
She always follows people that in some twisted way remind her of her dad and in the end helps bring the end of whatever group she is apart of.
The Delta lost so many in Lily's attempt to get the kids all because of one she knew from so long ago. One from the first group she destroyed.
im gonna be honest when i say i ... really never understood all the hang ups people had about lily returning to fill the villain role for s4
like lily returning in s4 makes more sense to me than kenny returning in s2 im gonna be real with you all. lily was at worst left on the side of the road and at best had her own rv at least she wasnt left for dead in a walker infested alleyway. personally i was hoping for a christa return (because i dont want to admit she really died 💀 no body=no death) but lily made enough sense to me and i was excited by her reveal
clem knew lily at the beginning of the outbreak. before 8 years of it turned them into different people. clem isnt the scared little girl she used to be. shes grown up into an extremely capable fighter. and while lily at the beginning of the outbreak seemed like a tired woman trying to keep it together, but also felt the need to take charge and didnt like being questioned (who also cared too much about her awful father but we get more insight into that in s4), by s4 shes lost any shred of kindness she mightve had left. she was military before the outbreak and now given a position of power rules through fear and an iron fist (just like her father). but there are moments between her and clem where we can see just a Glimpse of that old lily ("we were family once..."). but all of that goes away once she realizes that clem is a genuine threat now. and lily recognizes that clem would be a perfect soldier if she can just break her the way she herself was broken so long ago. and if she cant break clem then she'll break aj instead
and then we have the lee element. lily is the Only other person left from that first group at the motel (she did not destroy that group btw ben did like cmon now and ben Keeps destroying it after lily isnt even around anymore). and while shes wrong to say she knew lee better than clem ever did, lee and lily (and kenny) were group leaders together while clem was eating her apple and coloring with chalk. like the adults were speaking. and depending on how you played s1 lee could have a decent relationship with lily. lily being able to sow those seeds of doubt in s4 clems head is just fun mind games
they have History. clem still wears the hair ties lily gave her all the way back in s1. she helped take care of clem for a time. looked out for her. and in a different universe clem Easily couldve ended up standing in minnies shoes instead
also in regards to the delta we Know they dont really want to be kidnapping kids to fight in a war that would probably kill most of them in the first 5 minutes. if they had the adults to be fighting instead they would be. it just shows us how dire the deltas situation really is. they were just expecting to find a bunch of kids for easy picking but clem turned them all into skilled enough fighters to successfully kill a few of them and raid their boat. clem is a big enough win that it doesnt even matter how skilled the rest of the kids are. plus lily was just leading the excursion. we dont know how high up the ladder she really was and how much power she really held. maybe she had something to prove back at the delta (my one real gripe is that we didnt get to actually See the delta. in my perfect world there were 5 episodes and ep 4 was about the delta 😔)
both lily and clem are just trying to save their communities. the difference is lily wants to uphold the status quo of fear and force and war, and clem is trying to build a safe community thats different from the many shes seen. she and the rest of the kids just want to carve out their own little safe haven in this dangerous and unforgiving world. they make a place truly worth fighting for
clem getting some form of closure with lily i feel might get to help her close the book so to speak on her history up until this point. clem has been fighting for so long... but she has a new home now. a new community. she can Chill a little bit. shes gonna grow into such an incredible leader 😭 (not that she isnt already 😭)
#also ive heard conflicting info about whether lily is her own character separate from the comics or not#i dont think ive ever seen an official source just fan speculation?#i never watched the show past s2 so i cant speak on that either 💀#oof i love to ramble huh#'i hate writing essays' says the person always writing essays about her fave media#opossum-knight#replies with lexi#twdg#long post
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More side order criticism and complaining that you are under no obligation to read
I get that side order was a roguelike which apparently tend to be short? Idk ive never played one before but anyway that still doesnt justify the initial hype, the blatant change in aesthetics and plot (remember the first trailer? And the second trailer i think with the lobby doors looking VERY different and matching what we saw in the concept art trailer) almost last second fnaf security breach style, and the amount of stupid shit that happened throughout most of splatoon 3s lifespan since SUPPOSEDLY the games only gonna be getting updates for like, what, 2 more seasons? And its like wow we waited all this time and went through so much shit for a story thats hardly even a story. Once you unlock everything its just. Prlz grinding for gear to get.
It was fun! It was enjoyable! But it sucked and it wasnt worth all of that. Unfortunately i care a lot about splatoons lore and they didnt really go anywhere with what little lore they did have. They also contradicted themselves multiple times for a net zero lore gain anyway. This is about the whole memories """subplot""", if you can even call it that. It really was just "pearl and marina and also this other random irrelevant character talk to each other while you stand there and stare at them from the background" simulator and its like. Thats it? Thats the story? Thats what i waited through all the bullshit for? And then they make you think that there is more, actually, because they keep leading up to something, and then nothing happens. Like okay what was that for.
The gameplay was quick and easy because thats just my skill level. I didnt find it difficult. If youre good at salmon run then chances are youre good at side order. Theres nothing else to be done about that. Im not gonna play bad on purpose for a chance at a challenge. That isnt fun. I just wish the game was rewarding and to me the lore is the reward but... when you think about it literally at all nothing that marina did all this for shows any proof of having worked. She still has to hack her own vr world to do anything with it. Order, now smollusk, is still very much in control. They dont show you anything memory-related actually changing or being affected. They just say it happened and act like thats all there should be to it. And if they were gonna focus on memories, why did they make this whole thing about how bystanders can accidentally be sucked in and then do literally nothing with that? Why not show an actual change in the actual inkopolis square? Why murch of all characters to get a pallet. Why not involve iso padre, whos in inkopolis square now (im very happy about that), who had also lost his memories and was an established character that we could actually interact with in the previous game? It just doesnt add up. Like sorry that i expected good storytelling, its just this is the same people who made octo expansion and they keep trying to one-up octo expansion and they keep falling flat on their face because they keep thinking the gameplay is what made octo expansion so good when it was also the plot and the lore and the worldbuilding that added so much to it so i thought "this time for sure" especially with everything they showed us in the first trailer.
Again, i know it was all concept art, but surely it wouldnt be fair to show off so much only for the final product to be almost nothing like it? Surely if they werent set on the story then they wouldve waited longer to be realeasing trailers and announcing dlc in the first place? Surely it makes sense to expect what was shown. I dont get why theres some people who think everyone had too high expectations. Like its literally just a matter of if you think about any of it literally at all and actually care about it any way more than barebones surface level stuff literally at all then its natural to expect more.
#blah blah blah plot sucks and gameplay is good but my priority is plot so overall it sucks#splatoon 3#weaponblog#side order
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gender coining dump
was gunna make flag 4 these but got bored :// im prolly gunna make more 2 you can make flags 4 these if you want, you can also just take them if you want free 4 any1 regardless of my dni, just don't be rude directly 2 me :3 gendas under the cut
Overrueretasiegender- a gender relating to overgrown ruins in a fantastical sense. like an adventurer coming across an overgrown castle or temple, maybe inhabited by a magical creature or being. this gender feels whimsical and in awe, like discovering something new, something to behold.
Overgrouenbiengender- a gender relating to overgrown bones. this gender feels old, lost deep in the woods, but repurposed. something dead giving way to new life, a renewal cycle. despite being lost, it is not discarded nor forgotten as the woods reclaimed the bones as their own.
TSPliminalgender- a gender relating to the liminalness of the stanley parable. the best example is the confusion ending but any setting and/or scene/room in the stanley parable (ultra deluxe too) can apply to this gender. either you going through the rooms or you being the rooms itself
Skipplantgender- a gender relating to the skip button scene with plants. this gender either feels like a moment of peace during an unfortunate, painful, and/or terrifying situation or a peaceful setting with something more malicious brooding under the surface. or maybe its just the plants during the skip button
Phosskipplantial- a gender that is lit by the green light during the skip button scene with the plants
Bettermcshadergender- a gender relating to the better minecraft modpack with shaders, thats really it i just like the better minecraft modpack. this gender is whimsical n is very high fantasy but doesnt have 2 b. Baredteethquoteic- gender relating to the quote "I kiss you with bared teeth in fear that you might bite back." from a drabble written by me
Yourclothesquoteic- a gender relating to the quote "Your clothes are dirtied, whether it is with my blood or yours it is hard to tell, I doubt it ever mattered in the first place." from a drabble written by me
Hardtolovequoteic- a gender relating to the quote "It's hard to love a man who only knows how to love through spilled blood. It's hard to love a man who only knows how to bare his teeth and snarl. It's hard to love something that only knows how to bite back at the hand that feeds. It's hard to love a beast who only knows how to hurt and how to bleed." from a drabble written by me
Youwereatestquoteic- a gender relating to the quote "You were nothing but a test, a casualty." from a poem written by me
Onyourhandsquoteic- a gender relating to the quote "Their blood is on your hands, yet you have the gall to be disgusted by it." from a short story written by me
Smellslikeironquoteic- a gender relating to the quote "No tears will spill. No wails will be heard. No one is watching. No one cares. The leaves sway in an unapologetic apathy. You close your eyes in tired acceptance. It smells like iron." from a short story written by me
Bloodanddirtquoteic- a gender relating to the quote "Hands covered in blood and dirt. A new stain is added for every truth you buried, for every sin you committed, for every vow you have broken." from a poem written by me
Gnashyourteethquoteic- a gender relating to the quote "What would you do afterward; when you are finally pure, wash free of the stains that bind you? Do you expect to stay clean? To stay so…divine? Do you think you can keep your jaw clenched? You expect yourself to not snarl, to not gnash your teeth and bite?" from a poem written by me
Ungodlysnarlsquoteic- a gender relating to the quote "So your cries echo into screeches, into ungodly snarls made by a beast whose broken more than it has made. Who asks for more than it gave." from a poem written by me
Hurtcrybleedquoteic- a gender relating to the quote "Did it hurt? Did you cry? Did you bleed?" from a poem written by me
Storyisoverquoteic- a gender relating to the quote "The damage has been done, the wounds have bled, the building has collapsed, the story is over, and he's gone. Stanley is gone" from a fanfic written by me
Fragilevowsquoteic- a gender relating to the quote "Fragile vows in the hands of beasts, their nature only to break and destroy." from a fanfic written by me
Whatafernseesquoteic- a gender relating to the quote "I wish I knew what a fern sees in a clearing. Unseen, untouched, unnoticed by man. I want to know what pure nature looks like without the restraint of human eyes." written by me
#xenogender#xeno coining#xenogender coining#gender coining#mogai gender#mogai coining#liom#liom coining#mogai label#tsp genders lol#a lot of the quotes came from tsp drabbles :33#my own writing is so gender what can i say
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anon who doesnt have aspd and taught myself empathy here yet again! i am Now Thinking and remembering that a huge part of why i've never tried to go to therapy or anything is coz like i Know i'd use what i learn to like, manipule ppl better and shit. i enjoy playing w ppl Too much and coz Fun Childhood i've been good at it all my life, but cognitively i recognise its bad so it would be bad and not fair for me to go to therapy and get even better at it and manipulate ppl i love for my own fun. and like even i dont do illegal shit or even like drink alcohol or smoke coz then i can keep the moral high ground in arguments w ppl and i can say whatever i want and call em out on shit and create a fuss for them and stir the pot and they cant call me a hypocrite. like so much of what i do is about making sure i have a level of ability to manipulate and control ppl and situations. so many behaviours which arent explained by autism, idk why i've just brushed all of them aside except that i've gotten bored by overthinking abt them, and ive mostly gotten to a point where they're under control and im content w life
but back to remorse and empathy i honestly just think they're not really necessarily useful things and ppl place so much importance on "oh im such a good person i have so much empathy" but will also use their empathy/remorse to control ppl? like i know ppl w bpd who use their genuine guilt and worries and stuff to get ppl to feel sorry for them and indulge them instead of confronting and working on it. like even ppl w/o mental illness will sometimes try to use the fact they feel bad abt smth to erase their culpability instead of actually fixing their mistakes. it can be confronting for them that some ppl can be like "oh shit i made a mistake. fuck. oh well" (and sometimes fix their mistake/take responsibility) w/o remorse or other emotions to it coz i think it makes them realise their emotion doesnt absolve them
thanks to listening to me ramble!
man i feel that, im also obsessed with having the moral high ground, except i think my view of morality is the best one and everyone else is stupid. also i'm a hypocrite. i also hate hypocrites! yes this in of itself is hypocritical i am aware. do something morally reprehensible? shame on you! doesn't matter that i do the same thing with no intent to stop. its over anakin i have the moral high ground!! i have Standards and Morals and also i'm correct all the time. if i had the death note there would be no story and everything would be okay. i simply would not go mad with power and i'd only kill people who are deserving of it
also yeah i hate the empathy = morality thing i hate it so so so so much. i do think cognitive empathy is a useful tool and remorse can be useful as like, the emotions equivalent of getting spritzed with a water bottle and also you are a cat. do something shitty? feel remorse? my cuck ass is NEVER doing that again!! because remorse felt so bad the first time, why would i risk doing it Again and feeling remorse Again? its just not worth it. but then again if you get more and more used to its presence it wouldnt work all that great and also would suck balls
and i've known a dude w bpd who was like that, and ive known people with good ol fashioned Anxiety Disorder that were like that- worse, even! they thought that bc they had anxiety, they were these cutesy little waifs and anything they did could be rebutted with "but i have anxietttyyyyyy" and everyone was just expected to pity them because of it- no matter what they did! people put too high of an emphasis on emotion as the standard of morality- if you're a scared abuse victim, thats Moral and you are Pitiable, which is Good. however if you fought back, you are Immoral and you are Secretly Probably The Aggressor, which is Bad. (consequently, if you're too scared, that's Moral, however you Didn't Fight Back, which means you were acting Illogically, and Had It Coming, therefore you are Bad) which is hypocritical as fuck! ive taken responsibility w/o remorse and i've takne responsibility with remorse and remorse is Not the important part of this argument, it's emotional intelligence.
#no worries wrt the rambling!! this was interesting to do#thanku for coming to my ted talk :) to my ted talk :)#wasks
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so, in the process of transferring schools, one is tasked to fill upp all their requisite subjects on their form, with number of units and the grade you had on that subject. in turn this will be checked against the college's program with equivalent number of units and grade as well.
seriously, i would recommend writing all your grades and uniits in a piece of paper every semester, gives you a look over the prsent, past, and future. also it was really humbling.
and you know? i fucking hate humility. humility is just hiding your own power level. i just realised it just now.
what's worse is the fact that it reminded me of the trope that i had in my life: that reality's gaslighting me. that it doesnt matter what things really happen to you, only its outcome
this is also why i recommend it as well: it shows you where you are in life, putting you in the place where you actually are
sure you can be laughed at by your professor after receiving a 3.0 (in a "they really didnt know you" sense) but you still have that 3.0
sure you can have a 1.00 in that subject, but that's because one of your classmates did something bad and the professor took that as a consolation
sure you can have stories of people asking you and you teaching them like it was nothing. sure you can have those stories that you worked in your professor's company being handpicked as one of the rare students in his arsenal
but you still are a transferee student, who failed the last 1 semester of their life.
and what fight do you have in mind? your grades are littered with barely passes? doesnt matter if you went to a medical break or something. what matters the most is that you failed a subject, and that's how people would see you.
...and this is why i dont like talking about programming anymore. it's just painful. sure i have stories that i made programs and projects like this and that, but if you cant answer a simple mathematical algorithm puzzle, then you do fail.
doesnt matter if this is one of your favorite things to do. doesnt matter if you spent your whole high school obsessing about it. it's not enough to land you in footing. if you suck, you suck.
you have delusions of grandeur. that's what. even if things point to the contrary, papers said so. might as well believe that
and idk, when i wrote that transfer papers, all i can see is "wait, is that all i am? a dirt, grime, some stain here and there?" and it's not humbling, it's infuriating. it's stupid.
at by your professor after receiving a 3.0 (in a "they really didnt know you" sense) but you still have that 3.0
sure you can have a 1.00 in that subject, but that's because one of your classmates did something bad and the professor took that as a consolation (3.00 is barely passing and 1.00 is aceing a class)
hell i have intrusive thoughts while chatting my friend on my phone because it was that bad.
but who cares? i live in a relatively fine situation. could've been worse. all people would see is the fact i'm more capable than anyone.
people would only care if you're on paper said you need to be taken care of. even you dont. and vice versa, people wouldnt care about you if you dont show signs of anything.
...my BFF jokingly calling me a failure with a reference to my failed attempts in life. and, idk? it hurts. even now i still think about it. i wonder if he thought of it too.
on the flip side, i kinda find peace being the stupid one: at least expectations of you were as stable as it gets. no one's gonna ask why i dont know thngs even if i should. no one's gonna know. peace and quiet.
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ffxvi desperately tries to grapple with its identity as a final fantasy game while also trying to be something the series has never been before (m rated game of thronesesque dark fantasy) and honestly i think that internal conflict really is what kills the game most because it is at its best when it sheds its expectations as a final fantasy title and becomes its own thing with gripping political drama and high stakes in a less world-ending way. ultima kills just about all intrigue the story builds up which is especially disappointing because Annabella worked incredibly well as the games primary antagonist.. her and olivier were fumbled severely imo you cant get any cooler than THE! dion lesage having an actual unspoken war with a 10 yo
there was no reason (in my opinion!!!!!!!!!) to bring ultima into the mix and change the stakes so rapidly and drastically. wow this man is being manipulated by his evil cousin fucking wife into dragging the entire continent into a pointless war all while theres disloyalty stirring among the knights dragoon led by his OWN son but its all just ultima. like ok whatever but annabella would have made a vastly more interesting antagonist liek :P but of course it has a long history of intergalatic threats (usually god adjacent) that Should be the antagonists because its what final fantasy is. stakes larger than life, epic battles and flashy effects, i know i keep comparing ffxvi to heavensward, and i generally dont do that when criticizing games but i feel like its warrented for this: how thordan functions as an antagonist and final boss vs ultima
i think the most obvious difference is thordan is there and apparent since the beginning however ultima serves roughly the same purpose as lahabrea the background scheming ever-present force manipulating the game however lahabrea is merely a conduit by which thordan achieves his goal of being the god-king and not the surprise twist antagonist there to shed every character of their interesting appeal. barnabas suffers the most from this being easily the most interesting man here (i struggle to really say id like to see more of barnabas given what we do see of him is.............Well)but no matter what glimpses of his psyche we do get the allure is non existent because hes not a character in any meaningful way hes Just an extra limb to ultima who ultimately serves no narrative purpose besides saying cryptic things and be a boss fight (admittedly his fight is good. maybe the most ive struggled in the game which i mean as a compliment that dps check was brutal barely made it through by the skin of my neck spamming max potions when i could and relying solely on lb haha) where lahabrea acts as the mysterious force pushing the plot along hes only relegated to a dungeon boss as opposed to a trial because narratively it isnt lahabrea who wants this its thordan. its by his own hands that his god king form is achieved he feels like an actual character... barnabas is there to serve vague exposition that only goes barely explained by the end of 16
olivier and annabellas roles as antagonists feel more complete and thought out than the actual main 'villain' which is really disappointing, because any intrigue built by the conflict in Sanbreque is dashed when dion was simply wrong and olivier was ultima the whole time ooooooh
joshuas entire sideplot is relegated to following ultima similar to cloud but with none of the intrigue because we dont know Anything about ultima. hes only introduced to the plot as some vague concept joshua has an unexplained connection to (btw we still dk how/why joshua 'trapped' ultima in his heart/soul/whatever becos. none of it is elaborated on. i tried too i was hoping for an ff7og type hidden revelation if i did jotes side quests too but no....... i looked yall i tried i did
not to mention how joshua survivng kind of killed clives arc for me.. L3+R3 to accept the truth was kind of badass as fuck... too bad it doesnt matter and theres no truth for clive to accept joshua was never dead. clives arcs are perpetually meaningless. internal conflict about this power hes been given that could change the world for the better.. or worse and he could (and has) hurt/killed the ones he loves.. well doesnt matter joshua is alive and ifrit has caused no real harm to people who matter..
i remember talking to my irl, they were going off about fe3h about how the trailers built up political intrigue and expectation that was dashed when it all turned out to be villains behind the curtain manipulating everything with no foreshadowing and yeah... yeah
ultima was so poorly handled to me, nothing about his buildup felt coherent to me and all it did was serve to distract me from what i was genuinely enjoying (dominant political dramas) i really dislike it all.. god i wish there was more, theres a dlc coming out about leviathan, you might have honestly forgotten about leviathan because it was a single line of dialogue with no explanation build up or payoff. if you want to know why joshua namedropped leviathan and then moved on like it never existed pay square enix extra money and hopefully this wont be utter bullshit too lol.
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so the other night i passed out 4 times in a row while on a date. we were both high, and then after i took a smoke break i started getting really lightheaded and passed out on the way inside.
okay... that's awkward, but I've passed out before. i start reassuring her that this is nothing to be too concerned about. the lightheadedness doesnt wear off as quickly as I'd expect, and when i stand up i pass out again after only a couple steps.
"can you hear me?" she asks, and i wake up from a vivid dream that we are watching a movie. she's clearly pretty scared, so i go back to reassuring her. i pass out sometimes; it happens. i get back up, we make some more progress towards her room, i slip out of consciousness again. now im starting to wonder if this is a big deal after all. maybe if i lie down for a moment without disruption my body will be able to do whatever it's trying to get done by knocking me out? or maybe if i let myself lose consciousness again I'll just die. i tell her i can hear her and we take another step toward her bedroom before i collapse.
this time when i wake up i decide i just need to stay focused. it doesnt matter if im dying or not, we're heading to the bedroom and we can sort that out once im sitting on the bed. she asks if she should call 911.
"no," i tell her, "or, i don't think so. i think I'm okay." (i have told her that i think im okay every time i wake up. I'm not entirely sure it's true.)
"bedroom," i say, "we're going to the bedroom."
she helps me walk into her room. I'm still lightheaded, but convinced that i can mind-over-matter this consciousness thing. we make it to the bed and i sit down. i take deep breaths and it helps. over the next ten minutes the ringing in my ears begins to fade and the cold buzzing on my skin gradually dissipates. sitting on the bed is the most conscious-supporting position, apparently, as opposed to lying down or standing up.
we talked about it afterwards. i think she was more scared than i was, tbh. we just don't know why it happened; maybe it was the combination of weed and nicotine; maybe it was the addition of the single dose of cold/allergy medication i took; maybe it was the fact that i forgot my venlafaxine that morning. I'm fine now, or at least i think i am, although she wants me to go to doctor in case it was a heart condition. she's probably right, but i doubt i will. i feel fine now, and a doctor's appointment would mean admitting to a professional the myriad ways ive been irresponsible. i shouldnt even be smoking nicotine
#stuff to tell my therapist#mental illness#mental health#addiction#passing out#fainting#loss of consciousness#overdose#?
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You really don’t see how after I said no “I cant help with this today , I’m dealing with a lot and it’ll be better for you to handle this one on your own” and you responding with “ No thats why I just wanted you to ask Joseph what to do and you can tell me what he says” and “I just wanted to know if you could ask him for me if you could” is pushy?? I already said I can’t. You saying since I’m at the apartment with my boyfriend it would be better to have someone there because you have classes all day. We were on our way out to go talk after we had that telehealth appointment concerning my baby. You don’t know our schedule but you were assuming we were just going to be around not doing anything. And even if we were that's okay. I’m hosting and I cant help you. It was like my one day off too. You replying to previous messages saying “this was the question to ask Joseph” and “this was all the information and the location of the sound is in the video” after I just said I can’t help you is so freaking pushy and translates to you thinking I should’ve just done it, feeling like you needed to understand why I couldn’t, and that you already sent all the information so I know as much about your experience as you do which is RIDICULOUS and selfish. You dont need to explaining why it was “just one thing you needed’. It doesn’t matter because I already said no. You said 'its okay i got it" but everything you said before that made it clear that you weren't expecting me to say no and didnt respect it. It doesnt matter if youre busy and had to make time to do it, I was busy too. There's no reason to keep explaining that you "just needed" when I already said no, its so beyond pushy and bratty. I said I cant help you. Nothing has to be wrong or off for me to say no. It doesn't make any sense. I can't explain your experience for you and I don't have to. I said no. It just wasn’t what you were expecting to hear and you confirmed that when you later admitted you couldn't understand why I said no and that “there was no reason for it to be an issue” "there was no reason for me not to be able to ask" Okay??? You asked and I said sorry I cant and went about my day. pressing that it was an issue for the entire apartment when it wasn’t. The reason why It turned into an issue was because I said no. It wasn't an issue before that. No one said you couldnt ask or that it was a problem that you did. Its coming across like youre just saying that implying that I'M being difficult because I said no and you wanted me to do it. There was no issue. You asked, I said I cant help, you went on and on and on and on. “There was no reason for it to be an issue”- your projecting and its showing a lot about you. Who says stuff like that in response to a previous no??? Its so high handed and ugly and dismissive of my feelings and opinion. Oh my god. It’s bratty. Youre not the deciding factor in what’s an issue or not, especially when there was no issue.
You only started saying that because me saying no and my reaction to you pressing me about it made you feel like you asking ‘for just one thing for both of us’ was an issue. I dont not care that you're hearing disturbing sounds in your room but the problem and solution, effects you. Your behavior after I said no was the issue. I have my own stuff going on, and I don’t need to explain my life in detail to you in detail for you to hear and understand “I cant help you, it'll be better if you handle this on going problem (in YOUR room), on your own”. If I said yes you wouldn’t have kept pushing any of this. It was an ongoing issue in your room that you needed to find out about. I’m not going down to the leasing office and explaining your situation with videos and messages for you the morning I found out about it. Like seriously? Ugh. The way you originally sent everything was a lot and I was never going to relay all of that. I’m busy and it’s not my business or responsibility no matter how much you kpt trying to convince me that it was retroactively and with third party opinions. Because I didnt respond th way you were expecting/assuming me to.
So it was not unreasonable to think that they’d ask for other info pertaining to why you think it’s rats if I went down there or called for you. That’s why you originally sent me all that information. There was a good chance they were going to ask for it and I wouldn’t have known what to say because it’s not my experience. You couldn’t have known “you were not going to have to explain all of that Adisa”. It doesn’t make any sense. It was not an issue for “our apartment” yet in the least and you kept trying to get me to agree with you on that when it was clear that I don’t. I wasn’t trying to get you to agree with me that it’s not because I know how you are. I just said I couldn’t help and dropped it.
What is there to genuinely understand or if you’re trying to get your quick across don’t keep saying there’s no reason. It was just one thing that I needed you to do. I knew you could do it. There’s only so many places for the conversation to go after all of that, especially if you’re not respecting someone boundary I was still trying to understand you after all of that and I really need to like what are you expecting from people? You can’t talk to people like that and then expect them not to have a reaction especially when you’re standing in the fact that you thought I should’ve done it or you thought it wasn’t that big and especially when you keep saying that “please don’t think it’s just my thing, I knew you could do it”. No you’re telling yourself and trying to tell me that you knew I could do it because I wouldn’t. It was just one thing I need” like there’s only so many for the conversation to go after that. clearly You weren’t genuinely understanding and I didn’t accuse you about shit even though it was very clear I thought maybe at first this was all misunderstanding but after time I know I don’t think it was misunderstanding I think you didn’t wanna understand and if I said yes, none of this would’ve been happening.
I never said you asking me was a big deal. The task itself was out of the way and everything after that turned into a big deal. My response was no. If it just ended there this wouldn’t have been a big deal. The fact that you told me again and again that asking the question wasn’t a big deal, just said a lot about your character and how much of this is flying over your head. Me saying no shouldn’t equate to- this is a big deal to ask. “It’s not a big deal to ask” who said it was? You asked and I said no. Should be end of story.
And okay if you say you’ll handle the things you need to, I know that too, so do that. If you already handled it why are you still saying HOURS later that it was just one thing you needed and you couldn’t understand why I didn’t do it and bringing up that your therapist also said it wasn’t a big deal to ask.
“It really does. I only was answering you what you were asking. After you told me what it was I didn’t have any more questions really.” -What??? This is so confusing and yes the way you word things in your texts are OFTEN confusing. I didn’t ask you anything, there was nothing for you to answer. You asked ME if I could help you and I couldn’t. There shouldn’t have been a discussion or accusations and passive aggressive comments and your opinions about why I could’ve done it and not understanding why I said no after that. Why is this something along the lines of “I didn’t have any more questions really” about?? I said no. Stop. This really feels like YOU just don’t want to understand because you weren’t expecting me to say no and not agree that it’s a whole issue for the apartment that I needed to handle as soon as you wanted me to. This is so so so ridiculous.
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More Umineko
episode 1, part 5
the hidden family treasure isnt real, it cant hurt you
thats one hell of a bombshell to just drop and then leave the room without any elaboration. but i had been expecting the "six" mentioned to die in the riddle to be the older siblings and their partners. minus rosa maybe. idk. she seemed in a special position both because she is not as shrewed as her other siblings and because i expect the maria population to be affected by her death.
and i fully expect maria to be important later on due to her unique relationship with beatrice.
but well. thats not what happened later on.
anyway. rudolf, this isnt about you, first we need to look at my favourite wet dog of a woman, natsuhi.
damn girl. i promise youre not just a childbearing multifunctional screwdriver.
and of course not only does that mean her husbands status as the future family head is endangered, and her late childbirth "caused" that, he also didnt deem it necessary to mention the gold actually exists to her. she spirals so beautifully and painfully. all she ever wanted was to be useful and be a support tool and to make "her" family prosper. the family she left another one behind for. damn girl thats a sad unhappy marriage you got there. is the golden cage comfortable enough to endure it? are they feeding you good food through the bars? are they dusting you off on that high trophy shelf of yours? she has been made to understand that she has no worth on her own and she will Never be a real part of the ushiromiya family. later on we see her sad little room with her sad one person bed. its dire.
natsuhi would be a different person, had she been born in a position with more power. as a man. as an ushiromiya.
and he really just said "no you cant lol"
while krauss fails to comfort her and is, frankly, just kind of a prick, its understandable he doesnt want to involve her, i guess. its very interesting that this seems to be a cycle too, she is trying to secure a good marriage for her daughter as well, who she believes has no value of her own (bad grades, rowdy character.... undesirable leader and wife material), much like how she had to marry into this family too.
damn, so same as rosa perpetuating the physical violence.
its very touching to see natsuhi and jessica try and be nice and understanding to each other for Once. they really have to force themselves. its a lot of emotional labour that goes into it and its not perfect but there is value in it. even if ultimately i think it just brings up and enforces how big the chasm between them is. even though they are both in a similar position, strained and controlled by expectations around them, they cannot muster up the strength (and agency) to help each other and find happiness. sad!!!
its the undiagnosed narcolepsy.
and just like natsuhi, rosa has a short moment where she gets to express her apologies about pushing her trauma on her daughter. and much like natsuhi too, the message cannot reach its destination, no matter how good the intentions were.
speaking of fantastic healthy enviroments
even so, the evening goes well for shannon, i would say. in fact well enough to be a flag. the furniture plot thickens and, if she can survive the death flag that was just placed on her for longer, shannon might be graced with the chance to join the ranks of People. even if that does not necessarily equal being a Better People (=ushiromiya family member, as discussed above)
and yup. sure enough. shes nowhere to be found. instead natsuhi remains, protected by the charm perhaps. (this is my beatrice respects marias ambition to become a witch theory. dont interfere) its unfortunate.
the funniest possible way to lead the convo about how you appreciate your daughter in law
i really hope kinzo saying this to natsuhi made her feel somewhat appreciated bc god knows she needs it. where did that come from though. will he need a favour of her later? does he wish for her to succeed as an heir? since his children all only seem to wish for financial gain... while natsuhi cares about name and outward appearances. there is absolutely manipulation involved, even if it makes natsuhi feel good. and now she is powerful. at least for a while. and she shall be mean and evil towards others again. yay!
maybe im too obsessed with the gender politics of it all but it feels so significant that this was how kinzo decided to initially phrase it. he too sees that natsuhi would be a different person, had she been born in a position with more power.
well, its the morning of october the 5th. where is the dangan ronpa crime scene i had been expecting!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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I just found ur blog and read thru some of ur stuff and im in love !! Ur writing is nice to read, and always gives a nice picture of the situation
If its aight, could u do some headcannons for the demon bros Finding out mc goes real hard on housekeeping ? Im talking fast and good cleaning, does chores without problems, propably even cleans after them (totally doesnt mother them in anyway), all without complaint, mc just cares
Housekeeper MC!
(Feat. GN!MC and the Demon Bros)
✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦
Lucifer
The fact that he didn't have to shove a mop and bucket into your hands like the evil stepmother has him like 👀👀
Out of every person he's met, you and Barb are the only ones that actually enjoy cleaning? And now he's wondering if you've been influenced by him in some way because got damn are those floors sparkling-
Ever since you've arrived, the house has been immaculate. But as much as he enjoys that, he worries that you aren't leaving enough chores for his brothers to do.
They're gonna be lazy at this rate, especially if you keep cleaning up after them like that. He's planning to sit you down and have a good talk about how you should rest a bit, and- D...did you polish his desk????
"MC... as grateful as I am to you, I thought I asked you to rest? You don't have to clean every little thing in this house. You're here as our guest, and more, so I won't have you behaving like a maid. But if you're that interested in keeping your hands busy, you may feel free to maintain my desktop. It looks as good as new, thanks to you."
Mammon
Oh, so you're one of THOSE types, huh? The goody goodies that like to make everything clean and sparkly, huh?? Well don't expect him to help ya!
Was an asshole at first. Made messes to see if you'd clean them, tried to dump his chores on you, etc. But now that you've stolen his heart? Yeah, he wants you to sit down.
You're messing up your hands with all that time spent scrubbing crevices and dusting ugly old paintings, when you could be spending time with him!
Tch, that's it! If it's chores that're keeping you from looking his way, he'll just finish them before you can do anything! Checkmate!
"You're always scrubbin' somethin'! Let my brothers take care of the messes, while YOU sit down and watch this movie with me! Ain't no point in watchin' it by myself, so I ain't takin' no for an answer!" "Huh?? Waddya mean 'when was the last time I vacuumed'??"
Levi
Oi oi oi...! What do you think you're doing with that feather duster?! You don't think you've got the right to approach his figures with it, do you?! WRONG!
But you quickly discover how ticklish Levi is, and he squirms out of your way while watching in horror as you... delicately handle every figure? And dust them from top to bottom, without so much as an accessory out of place..?
Wait... are you seriously okay with picking up all that trash?? S-some of it's sticky from all the junk food, and- Gah! Don't go messing around in his closet!!!
Yeahhh Levi doesn't let you clean his room lmao. It's way too stimulating to watch you carefully touch every surface in his room... I-it's like you're heaven everything with your presence, and...
"S-so yeah! The only things you're allowed to clean are the figures and the outside of Henry's tank! Nothing else, got it?! Anything more and I seriously won't be able to handle it...I won't even be able to sit still in my own room......." 👉👈
Satan
Satan found it funny how willing you were to take up every little chore there was to be done in the house and he's got to admit, reading is much more enjoyable in a tidy environment.
But what he REALLY wants to know is how you managed to dust off every single book in the house, his room included, without him?? Knowing?? And you've done every shelf as well, cleaned out the cobwebs behind it, and even repaired that little tear in the upholstery of his favorite arm chair????
Has also deduced that you're probably the maid character in the books that knows everything. Actually, you're a lot like Barbatos. What secrets are you hiding human 🔫
Just kidding. But yeah, when you insist on dusting his room, he follows you around the room and watches you. You know, just in case you fall or something falls on you! No other reason.
"As much as I like having you here all to myself, it makes me feel bad watching you do that by yourself. Why don't you we clean together? We'll get it done twice as fast, and when we're finished, I'd like to read a book to you. You remind me of a certain character from a murder mystery novel I've started."
Asmo
Eeehhh?!?!? You've seriously managed to organize both his endless skin care product collection, and his ENTIRE wardrobe?!? You're amazing...!
And you don't stop there. You were more than happy to clean his tub for him and everything, and you know how hard it is to get oil off the side of a tub, right? You're a lifesaver!
Asmo casually pawns off his chores too you. Oh, he just did his nails! Can you do the dishes? Ah, he just bought this outfit. Can you take out the trash? He's about to go out with his friends to a party, so be a dear and take care of the common bathroom for him?
Lucifer scolds the shit out of him every time he catches him doing that. You're welcome. But don't think Asmo won't repay you! He'll give you so much love, you'll be drowning in it! Figuratively or literally, depending on your preferences-
"Fufufu... if you wanted my attention, you should've just told me! You didn't have to go tidying up my shoe collection, but I'm happy you did~! If you keep spoiling me like this, I might not be able to keep my hands off of you! Unless... that's what you wanted?"
Beel
Things tend to get pretty messy with Beel around, with the trail of crumbs he always leaves in his wake, and how he manages to get every surface he touches sticky. But you must be a miracle worker...
You're like a living roomba, and his ravenous appetite is no match against your cleaning skills! You seem to predict when the food bits will fall, and it's thanks to you that he can eat without a care in the world!
It's actually kind of scary, though. He'll drop a bite of his sandwich and move down to retrieve it to eat, and... it's gone. Poof. Into the ether of the garbage can...
You can still rest once in a while though, you know? Beel offers to help you with the cleaning, and he's more than happy to let you climb up his shoulders to reach those high places. It makes him happy to know he can lend a hand.
"MC, I already cleaned over here so you don't have to do it. I cleaned there, too. That means you don't have anything else to do, so why don't you have a lunch break with me? It's not good to work so hard all the time."
Belphie
Belphie's one for the more observant brothers, so your clean freak habits didn't go unnoticed. He didn't know if you were obsessed with cleaning, or if you genuinely enjoyed it, but at least you were doing it without a fuss?
And man did you do a good job. Everywhere you cleaned was left with the lingering smell of vanilla and lavender, and... you know, the smell is making him sleepy.
Every pillow his head touches seems especially fluffy, too! When he found out you made a regular habit of washing and fluffing them, and they smell amazing... He feels like he's laying on a cloud...
He won't admit it genuinely, but he really does love what you're doing with the place. It makes him feel a little fuzzy inside when he finds his pillow on his bed, freshly laundered and soft to the touch. He clings to it extra tight those nights.
"You know if you keep this up, I might prefer the pillows to your lap. Ah, but don't worry, I don't really mean it. There's no way a pillow could replace you, no matter how good it smells. I think."
#I can vibe with this because I clean pretty often when I'm stressed and I just generally enjoy most cleaning#obey me#obey me!#obey me shall we date#obey me! shall we date?#shall we date? obey me!#shall we date obey me#obey me lucifer#obey me headcanons#obey me imagines#obey me writing#obey me scenarios#obey me mammon#obey me levi#obey me satan#obey me asmo#obey me beel#obey me belphie
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Hey could you do one with max verstappen, where the reader a fight about him not helping around the house (witch he doesnt do because he is just tired from working hard but the reader dont know) so they yell at max and he suddenly walks away but then they find him crying in bed, because hes overworked and feels like hes never gonna be good enough at being a driver and the readers boyfriend. And feels like he can only dissapoint the reader, his dad and cristian. But the reader comforts him. Tnx
Because I'm not good enough...
Max Verstappen x Reader
Warnings: angsty
Word count: 2 k
Requests are open :)
You were sat at the dining room table, staring out at the empty seat in front of you. Your arms crossed across your chest and your lip in between your teeth. You had been sat there for an hour - in the grand scheme of things an hour didn’t seem like such a long time but it was his final warning and an hour was just long enough to allow for your anger to boil over.
Dinner was in the fridge - the same dinner you had cooked an hour ago, your phone lay screen up on the table - the same phone you used to call Max two hours and a half hours ago, he told you he was on his way home. Home whilst you were in the UK was 25 minutes away from the Redbull HQ. This was becoming a regular occurrence, some nights he would come home so late that you had already taken yourself to bed. The atmosphere in the house seemed to freeze over whenever he was around even though you were yet to come out of summer, there was something hanging over the pair of you - unspoken feelings and as of now a red hot anger that threatened to escape from your usually composed nature.
Ever since the championship had taken a turn in the favour of Redbull, Max had started to become much more distant. It started off with him not inviting you along to the races, leaving on the Wednesday before race weekend and sometimes not seeing him until the following Tuesday and that was on a stand alone race weekend. On the triple headers, it could be nearing two weeks until you two were spared 5 minutes alone and even then it was a brief conversation before he rushed back to the factory or to train.
You thought you knew what you signed up for and since yours and Max’s relationship and that was three years ago so you thought you had seen it all - been through it all with him, witnessed every high and every low. This was a new territory and you knew that if it wasn’t tackled soon -
The click of the door lock echoed in the hallway, you straightened in your seat - eyes locked ahead of you and your knee bouncing.
Max sighed loudly and wiped his hand over his face, it had been a long day - he had been at the factory up until Christian had invited him out to lunch, it was nice to catch up with his boss and Max felt like he owed the man so much; guiding him through the years that had led up to the moment they found themselves in. Max felt like over the past years he had matured as a person, sometimes still short tempered but being an F1 driver it wasn’t necessarily a bad trait. After his lunch with Christian, his dad had called him - the less said about the conversation the better. By the time you had called, the last thing he wanted to do was come home and risk upsetting you. He had taken himself on a run - to clear his head and focus on what he was going to say to you because he felt like something definitely needed to be said.
He also owed a lot to you, you had put up with so much over the years and standing by his side even when he had made a mistake - although you were very quick to tell him when he was in the wrong. You seemed to be on his level, a blunt and forward look at life - there was no time for dawdling about when you had things to be done. Life was short and there was no time to waste.
Recently however, he was putting so much pressure and stress on himself about work that the hours slipped away from him and so did the time spent with you. He felt the atmosphere change around the pair of you - as though he was always walking on thin ice, the cracks beginning to show. The guilt he felt was nothing like he had ever felt before, all he wanted to do was talk to you but he was scared of pushing you away - which is ironic because not talking and letting the pent up anger build up was having the same effect. He was never that good when it came to talking about how he felt - as much as he wanted to he felt as though he would be a burden and that he would put too much pressure on you. He could never tell you what he really felt like inside. It was embarrassing, he knew that a professional athlete should never feel what he felt. It weakened him and having weaknesses in a sport like Formula 1 was not an option.
Max shrugged his coat off and walked through to the main room of the apartment - the room where you were sat waiting to pounce as though he was your unsuspecting prey.
He offered a tired smile, in response he got a sneer. Swallowing hard, you felt the anger take over, like some monster escaping from a cage.
“I have been sitting here for an hour, Max -” You shot to your feet, pointing at the table, your voice cracked slightly. “For months, you’ve been leaving me - it’s me who’s been cooking for us both, cleaning, washing - everything, Max. By myself.” You were shouting now, your heart threatening to break free from your chest. Max just stood there, a blank expression on his face - his gaze fixed to the ground. “I don’t understand what went wrong, Max. We were happy, hell, we spoke to each other. Now, I’m alone. In fact, I may as well be alone if this doesn’t change.” The words had fallen out of your mouth before you had any time to consider them - or the consequences. Your eyes went round with shock and you fell back to your seat. A loud silence filled the room.
Max, too, had not expected the words that had initiated the silence. He opened his mouth, eyes still on the ground, then closed it again before raising his head and looking you dead in the eye.
“You don’t mean that.” He managed to mutter, barely being able to raise his voice any louder. He felt a tired emptiness, this was the last thing he had wanted to happen.
“That’s all you have to say to me.” You rounded on him again, angry tears threatening to fall from your eyes.
“No - I -” He stuttered, then closed his eyes, inhaling slowly, “I just don’t think we should talk things through whilst you’re angry -” He saw you about to interject, when he raised his hands. “You have every right to be. That’s not what I’m saying. I think we should wait to talk about it so we don’t say things we are going to regret later.” Max could feel his throat constricting, he was battling to keep his emotions at bay.
You sniffed and nodded slowly, placing your head in your hands - hot tears escaping and shoulders tensed.
Max swallowed thickly, his eyes swimming with tears. He made a move and after no interruption left the room. He had only made it to the stairs before he collapsed, the fatigue getting the better of him. He was such an idiot, a fact he was certainly aware of now, how could he have let things get this bad. Did that make him a selfish person?
He couldn’t hold it in any longer, a harsh sob escaping from his mouth - fingers shaking and his head a loud mess.
As soon as Max had left the room, you had gotten up to get some water - when you paused, a sound catching your attention - a deep sounding sob. You waited, a line appeared between your brows. Slowly and carefully, you inched towards the door - waiting with baited breath for the sound again.
It was coming from the stairs and there was only one person it could be. Regret instantly pooled in the pit of your stomach, you hadn’t meant for him to cry. You were just so angry and he needed to know that.
“Max.” You called out softly, unsurprisingly there was no response. You went in the direction of the stairs and hunched over in front of you was your boyfriend - attempting to stifle his sobs. You rushed forwards, placing your arms around his shoulders and pulled his body into yours. Instinctively he wrapped his arms around your waist. You kissed the top of his head, stroking his hair as he continued to cry - you allowed him to empty his emotions out; some tears of your own betraying you entirely.
“I’m sorry, I really am.” Came a muffled voice. Pausing, you released your hold of him and placed your hands either side of his face - offering him a watery smile. Then, using your sleeves you wiped his tears away - he watched your every move, waiting for you to say something. When you didn’t, he braced himself - lips trembling; he knew it was now or never. He had to tell you how he really felt.
“I’m not good enough.” He stated simply, his eyes glossy. Your forehead furrowed. “I’m never going to be good enough to take the championship, I’m going to let everyone down. Everyone that has ever believed in me - it doesn’t matter what I do, how much work I put in - I’m never good enough. And you -” He paused, meeting your gaze, a lump forming in the back of your throat. “I keep letting you down, time and time again. I was the one who caused this, I’m never going to be good enough for you.”
“If you believe that -” You began, kissing the newly formed tears away, “Then I will eat your race shoe.” You moved to sit next to him on the stairs, pulling him into your side. “Why didn’t you tell me that’s how you felt.”
You felt Max shrug, the side of his head resting on yours. “I didn’t want to burden you with all of my problems, you already put up with so much.”
“I will always have time for you, Max.” Grasping his hand in yours, “You are enough, you are more than enough. You are Max Verstappen, the fastest, strongest guy I know.” You chuckled lightly, “I know it may sometimes feel like that and that’s ok. You are putting yourself through so much - maybe, it’s time to give some consideration for your personal life. It’s unhealthy to work all of the time - then we run into issues like these.” You spoke softly, almost whispering but you could tell he was hanging onto every word you spoke. “I love you, Max. I don’t know what I would do without you.” You admitted, turning your head to look at him. He chewed on his bottom lip, processing your words.
“I love you too, more than anything.” He murmured, placing his forehead on yours. You lifted your head slightly to leave a soft kiss on his nose, earning the corners of his lips to quirk up.
Closing your eyes, you relished being in his arms again, to have him close to you. You had missed it. You had missed him. Both of you knew you had a lot to work through, that it wouldn’t simply disappear but both of you were going to do it together. Hand in hand. And that was more than enough.
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transcription of slides under the cut:
[SLIDE 1] the vibes ao3’s top 9 mdzs ships give me (a really stupid thing i made on a lazy saturday)
[SLIDE 2] wangxian: the wholesome canon relationship (with a hint of spice)
ok maybe calling the union between a demonic cultivator and a secret sex fiend “wholesome” isnt exactly accurate…but that’s where the “hint of spice” comes in
other than that tho? i remember seeing a meme somewhere about wangxian and sangcheng and wangxian was described as “domestic gays with a house and a white picket fence and two kids” and honestly? yes
not that they cant be freaky. id say their particular brand of freakiness is vaguely surrealist suburban horror. make of that what you will
[SLIDE 3] xicheng: either its “pair the spares” or just about trauma
their dynamic is 500% “karen/enabling husband” but like in a good way
objectively the best-dressed couple you will ever meet. like seriously why are you even trying? theyve got you beat
jc would own a flower shop and punch you in the face for saying a single bad thing about his flowers. lxc would own a tattoo parlor and hand you a lollipop and tell you how proud he is of you for not crying while he gave you a tattoo
they dont strike me as a “every evening we relax and watch the sunset” type of relationship B U T every other week they go stargazing with a detailed map of the night sky
[SLIDE 4] xiyao: either a) the angst of betraying/being betrayed or b) the angst of killing/being killed
high society gays. they would both unironically wear tuxedos to a mcdonalds. lxc would see it as a fun couples thing and jgy would do it to assert his dominance
i swear they would be among the smiliest of the major couples. only one of them would give you a happy smile
dont mess with them. no like dont mess with any of the couples but so far jgy is the first one who would make your life living hell and keep you around long enough to suffer the consequences
[SLIDE 5] sangcheng: being simultaneously over- and underestimated
i saw a meme about sangcheng and wangxian where sangcheng was described as something along the lines of “wine aunt and vodka uncle” and honestly? yes
they’re both human disasters. nhs would have various splotches of color on his clothes and you cant tell if it was intentional or if theyre actually stains. jc is very neat and organized but will have a mental breakdown at the slightest inconvenience
sometimes they just sit down across from each other and. cry. its how they bond
idk why it popped into my head but they’re both ace Because I Said So
[SLIDE 6] xuexiao: cute domesticity but also murder
i refuse to believe that xy is anything but unhinged in every universe. whether or not thats a good thing is up to you
xy could and would murder you in your sleep and not feel bad about it until xxc told him off. even then he might still decide it was worth it
xxc doesnt exactly know about The Murder Stuff(TM) but he knows some shit is off but he trusts xy enough to not comment on it
they would meet and hook up in a bar and mutually decide that they may as well stay together for the rest of their lives the next morning
[SLIDE 7] xuanli: the token straights (but also? theyre really cute???)
i did not expect them to be as cute as they were but here i am
anyway jyl has jzxuan wrapped around her little finger and shes just too nice to use that to her advantage
if jyl asked jzxuan for some chocolate jzxuan would just buy her the entire hershey company and forget to give her an actual chocolate bar and jyl is too sweet to actually say anything about it
they would definitely have like 20 children. theyd fucking love being parents. the moment having another child became dangerous theyd start adopting left and right. theyre rich they can afford it and their hearts are big enough for all their kids so why would they not?
[SLIDE 8] songxiao: childhood friends to lovers AND perfect power couple
i know they have more nuance than this but i cant help but think of them as The Perfect Couple(TM)
not shipping-wise!! i mean like. theyre both law-abiding citizens. their house looks like a model house. theyre dressed super neat and handsomely. they both know cpr and first aid and one of them is a lawyer and the other is an award winning writer. idk who is who but yk.
they are who people call to deal with problems instead of the police and they delight in that fact. that is what i mean by them being The Perfect Couple(TM)
[SLIDE 9] chengxian: disasters through and through
uhh i am going to be spending the entirety of this slide ignoring the fact that i personally consider them siblings
they would live in a dingy studio apartment in the heart of a city and theyd both never be home
theyre both super fucking rich but theyd never have any money on hand so dont be surprised if they just starve out on the street one day because theyre just that stupid
they collectively have the self esteem of rotting cabbage but theyre keeping themselves and each other alive purely out of spite and sheer force of will
[SLIDES 10] nielan: childhood friends to lovers AND himbo power couple
psst heres a secret: neither of them are actually himbos
H O W E V E R they both 500% pretend they are. they intentionally act as stupid as possible just for the fun of it
the best part is when they stop acting stupid when something important happens. crouching-moron-hidden-badass at its finest
also the older brother energy is overflowing. it does not matter who you are or how old you are. if you meet them then youre going to walk away with two new big brothers
[SLIDES 11] the end (unless i gather the willpower to make a part 2)
#mdzs#mdzs hc#wangxian#xicheng#xiyao#sangcheng#xuexiao#xuanli#songxiao#chengxian#nielan#wei wuxian#lan wangji#jiang cheng#lan xichen#jin guangyao#nie huaisang#xue yang#xiao xingcheng#jin zixuan#jiang yanli#song lan#nie mingjue
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